Bedeisms

Here are a few Bedeisms. Bedeish.

Pants are ‘japans.’ Always.

He likes me to make letters out of Play-Doh. He specifies “Want see ‘a’?” or, alternately, “Want see CAPSLOCK ‘A’?”

We have a box of candy canes that look like these. He saw them in the cabinet a few days ago and said “Want see Bob? Want see red-n-white Bob? Want see red-n-white Bob Js?”

And my favorite… arms up, sweet boy says, “I love you!” as he’s scooped up for a great big hug.

puzzled

The puzzle ribbon.

Puzzle ribbon

As far as I know, it’s the logo of the Autism Society of America. I don’t know where it came from beyond that. I did a cursory Google to try to get some history behind it, but came up with little. It’s now overwhelmingly associated with autism and autism awareness.

I chose to use the non-puzzle ribbon graphic for my blog this month. On the face of it, I don’t really have a problem with the puzzle ribbon. I’m sure I puzzle Bede. I also like the idea of an iconic symbol for the cause of autism awareness. But still, I don’t use it.

I don’t use it because people are not puzzles. Or, if they are, they aren’t especially more puzzling because of their autism. The puzzle implies, to me, that autism has to be put together by someone before it is complete. That the autistic person is not an agent, a person, himself – until he is assembled. That could not be farther from the truth. Bede, and every other autistic person I know both online and in the flesh, is a whole, complete person needing nothing added or removed from him to make him finished. He does not need a cure because he is not sick.

So that’s why I don’t like the puzzle ribbon and the puzzle metaphor, and why you won’t see it here.

ASUS Eee

Thinking of getting one of these for Bede when his SSI payment comes in. It gets great reviews. He uses the computer to communicate more and more and it would be great to have something portable for him that’s his. We have a laptop but it’s quite fragile, and the ASUS is marketed as shock proof.

Hmm.

I also like the name. Bede warbles and hums as he runs about in the house, and that sounds like him: “Asus! EEE!”

M&Ms (or Smarties) Autism Day Meme!

Seen at a comment left at Wyatt’s Blog by the tao of fish:

And remember to have a packet of smarties some time today (it’s a new ritual for the 2nd of April…). You must sort them before you eat them, and you must eat them in a specific order of your choice. Those are the only rules.

I’m not in a country that sells Smarties*, but we do have M&Ms, which I hope are an acceptable substitute. Bede sorted mine for me, and in fact fed them to me, one by one, in this color order: red blue brown green yellow orange. That’s all the reds, then all the blues, and so forth.

*Smarties here are a horrid little candy that consists of long cellophane wrapped tubes of sugar pills, and we mostly only eat them around Halloween.

What’s Wrong With This Picture

To kick off Autism Awareness Month I would like to direct you to an essay written by Kerry Cohen called What’s Wrong With This Picture.

Whenever I outline this list — the list of where he is “behind” and where he is “on par” or “ahead” — I get uncomfortable. None of it captures who he really is, which can’t be contained in a paragraph or maybe even with words. He’s just Ezra. He’s just who he is.

Kerry and I ‘know’ each other from a special needs parenting board near and dear to both our hearts. It’s a great essay and I think you’ll enjoy it.

much better, thanks, and a tornado

Everything clean! Thanks for the well wishes.

The tornado sirens just woke me. In Tornado Alley, we have tornado sirens like air raid sirens that the National Weather Service (I think) turns on when there’s a tornado.

Tonight there are tornadoes far to the north of me, but very close to my parents. They should be fine though – the tornado passed about a mile or two north of them. I stuck with News 9, and they kept me advised.

I think I’ll go back to bed, we seem to be in the clear.

quite tiring around here

Today was, whew. I woke up to someone yelling downstairs, which had me up like a shot – only to find that they were arguing over a soda straw and a yarn end. I was so not patient with that, especially because there were four other yarn bits and two other straws right there, for God’s sake. Argh!

Then Bede was very upset (read: screaming at the top of his lungs) because one of his favorite websites was down. And then Gilbert, who is working on getting out of diapers, had a huge mess. And all the dipes and wipes were out in the laundry room, which is outside. And it was cold.

It was at that point that I wanted to just go back to bed.

And then, this afternoon, the pipe leading to the main sewer clogged, so every single drain in my house overflowed. Yep. While Sean was gone, and unreachable, for about 5 hours. Yes, the toilet too. And the kids were in the shower, so the bathtub was full, and the sink in the bathroom was full because Sean had shaved in it just a few minutes before, and the kitchen sink full because Faith had used it.

And then?

Then the water from the bathroom, the toilet water, the yucky from a rinsed diaper water, it seeped through the floor and started leaking through the kitchen ceiling.

Right over the cereal and cracker boxes. Yah.

Mr. Rooter was called and all was fixed. My mom came over and a.) watched the kids for 20 min while the plumber fixed it and b.) paid for said plumber because I had no money and Sean was gone. Our landlord will reimburse you Mom, but thanks for being there (like always, but we don’t take you for granted Mom. you’re amazing!)

So, that was that. Guh.

My friend learned today that her unborn son does NOT have a life-threatening urinary valve blockage and associated renal failure. So even though my day really blew hers was one of the best of her life, I’d expect. I’m totally basking in that happiness secondhand, and so, so glad that my biggest problems are poopy cereal boxes and squabbles over yarn ends.

Goodnight all.

knitting geekery, longies

TECHknitter’s post on flat tops and no distortion of ribbing at the crown decreases for ribbed hats.

I know most of my readers aren’t knitters. And even those who are aren’t as geeky as me.

But a  few of you are just as geeky and “I can’t knit a pattern unless I modify it.” Enjoy!

On that note, finally got my own copy of EZ’s Knitter’s Almanac. Best $8 I’ve spent in years! Contrary to what many have been told, Little Turtle Knits did not come up with the term “longies” for knitted wool pants. So if you’re selling them as longies and get hassled by someone who says you can’t call them that unless you get a LTK license, refer them to page 25 of Elizabeth Zimmermann’s Knitter’s Almanac and tell them to buzz off. So there!

I know a few knitters who were bullied a bit about that a few years ago. Meh.

No Bede (Gilbert)! At’s Mine! Don’t Touch It! Screeeeeeam!

I had hopes that Trixie’s scream would leave as her language grew, but so far it’s just adding to it. The scream is truly magnificent to hear, like a physical thing. That such a small throat could produce such an incredibly loud noise… wow. I’ve read that howler monkeys can be heard for (goes to look it up) 3 miles. She’s not that loud, I’m sure, but very penetrating, you know? Whew.

Ah, the soundtrack of my life.

the last of the birthdays

Saturday Faith and Bede had their joint birthday party. It was a blast! We had an assortment of friends and family come over for cake. Nothing extravagant. Faith was given Barbies, craft kits and fairy books and Bede was given alphabet books and stickers, car books and several Hot Wheels.

The best moment was when we were singing Happy Birthday and Bede, who was in the living room totally absorbed by his stickers, came in to the dining room where we were singing and sat down in front of his cake and actually tried to blow the candles out when we finished singing. He never ‘got’ birthdays before this, and the singing would either make him scream (he used to REALLY hate when we sang) or he’d ignore it and lunge for the cake. This year he knew what was what.

I’m so thankful for his autism because it makes me notice and appreciate those sorts of little things that parents of nonautistic kids totally take for granted. (Or at least I did, anyway, before Bede came into our lives.) As well as so many things I’d never have noticed at all. WTG Bede!

Faith’s cake was florally encrusted with frosting flowers. Bede’s was 18 cupcakes spelling H A P P Y  5TH  B I R T H D A Y  B E D E. They both loved their cakes. Faith’s was really, really beautiful, and Bede’s was, well, really letter-y.

Then there was Easter, which will get its own post tomorrow with pictures. Now I gotta go to bed!

Apples falling close to trees, and so forth

Bede’s up for his annual visit with the spectacular Diana Mobley, PhD in a month or so. I’m thinking over his development this year, along with autistic mind structure, and I saw these tests posted in a community for adults with Asperger’s Syndrome.

I took ’em.

Autism Spectrum quotient:
Your score: 40
0 – 10 = low
11 – 22 = average (most women score about 15 and most men score about 17)
23 – 31 = above average
32 – 50 is very high (most people with Asperger Syndrome or high-functioning autism score about 35)
50 is maximum

Systemizing quotient:
Your score: 67
0 – 19 = low
20 – 39 = average (most women score about 24 and most men score about 30)
40 – 50 = above average (most people with Asperger Syndrome or high-functioning autism score in this range)
51 – 80 is very high (three times as many people with Asperger Syndrome score in this range, compared to typical men, and almost no women score in this range)
80 is maximum

I always think my own identification as ‘probably autistic’ is all in my head. Ha, ha. Of course it is, where else would it be? In my knees? But seriously. I guess I really might be.

Raising ’em right

Bede just scored a win.

He climbed up on the dining table, leaned over to the shelves next to it, and nabbed our Firefly box set. He dashed off with it, crowing “Fie-er-fwy! Hmhnn!” and before I could catch up to him (I was holding G-Lo) he had a disc out of the box and ran over to the DVD player.

He selected “Shindig.” One of my faves. The captions are on and he’s reading them all and hopping up and down happily. He seems to like River and Mal the best – kid’s got taste. Tomorrow he’s going to line up exciting new crime, I’m sure.

On that note, I loved the second one of these.

Why I’m blogging, exactly

I don’t know why I blog vs. keeping a private journal. I like to get your comments, I guess. But that also means that I feel like I need to entertain you. And I worry that you’ll be bored by my short “Bede did this” posts.

But at any rate, today Bede played with Cars cars with Faith and me, which he never does.

And now the baby is crying so I can’t elaborate.

blown away

I’m writing this here to remember it.

Gilbert just bumped his head, and came over to me crying. (It’s unclear whether he bumped his own head or was pushed into bumping it by Bede.) Bede got off his computer, squeezed in next to Gilbert – basically draping himself over Gilbert, who had his head in my lap – kissed Gilbert’s cheek and then, as Gilbert stood up, gave him a gentle, loving hug with an affectionate look on his face.

I was verbalizing through this for both boys: “Nice boys! Brothers! Brothers love! A kiss! A hug! Bede loves Gilbert! Gilbert loves Bede!” Gilbert was just as touched by it as I was, and smiled and hugged back as he said “I love you too, Bede.”

I’m just blown away by this. My sweet boys! Snif.

A math problem

I got this in an email:

This is great…

This is a 5th grade math problem. If you can’t stand word math problems,
Just delete now. If you can open the spreadsheet, you’ll see it’s a very
Small list of people who have gotten the correct number. THIS IS NOT A
TRICK QUESTION.
This is a real math problem so don’t say that a bus has no legs.
The bus driver is not part of the equation.

There are 7 girls in a bus.
Each girl has 7 backpacks.
In each backpack, there are 7 big cats.
For every big cat, there are 7 little cats.

Question:
HOW MANY LEGS ARE THERE ON THE BUS???

The number of legs is the password to unlock the Excel sheet.
If you open it, add your name and send it on to see who else can unlock it.

Good Luck! It Works.

I’m not an Excel user, so I had to download Microsoft’s Excel Viewer thingy. I got the correct answer, but I don’t like email forwards (tho this one is clever.) But I did enjoy it – and I got it right.

So, here’s my plan: If you think you know the correct answer, enter it as the password here and leave a comment.

Meow! Get to it!

autism, vaccines, and me

Emily asked me what I thought about David Kirby’s recent post on autism, mitochondrial disease and vaccines. David Kirby is the author of Evidence of Harm and a strong promoter of the anecdotal claim that vaccines cause autism and are responsible for the increase in autism diagnoses we have seen in the US recently.

I don’t believe that there is a convincing link between vaccines and autism. I believe that the increase in autism diagnoses is due entirely to the broadening of the diagnostic criteria. In other words, more children have been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders because the definition of autism has changed in such a way that it now can fit six people out of every thousand instead of one.

Here is an excellent and very readable book on that topic: Unstrange Minds, by Roy Richard Grinker.

I don’t think there are any more autistic people now than there ever have been before. I think we’re just finally seeing the autism for what it is.

I will look into Kirby’s reasoning more thoroughly when I have time. I’m willing to believe that vaccines could make an underlying condition worse, which is what that post seems to be saying? I am tired.

(NB: Most of you know this already, but Bede’s autism diagnosis was given before he had any vaccines. We vaccinate on our own delayed schedule chez Glee, and so I am completely sure that his autism is unrelated to vaccination.)